Mama Monday 1-7-13 – Leave Kate Alone!!


As a fellow pregnant woman, I would like to speak on behalf of Kate Middleton and just say


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Since the day her pregnancy was announced, I have wanted to write this post because I was shocked and appalled by all of the articles that immediately popped up all over the internet.  I know she is in the public eye, but seriously, people, do we all really need to be talking about all of these details?  Sure, it is perfectly fine to be happy for them, and, given their position, for their to be some mention of it in the media, and even chatter on social media.  But honestly, I get overwhelmed and, frankly, even a bit annoyed by innocent and good-intentioned questions, comments, and concerns from my well-meaning family members and friends.  You know, like when I was carrying pans of food from the oven to the buffet table on Christmas Eve when suddenly my aunt forbade me from carrying the baked ziti because it was too heavy.  When you have a pan of baked ziti that is heavier than my 2-year-old, I’ll let someone else carry it.  And no, hubby, just because I have my hand on my belly does not mean anything is wrong.  I can’t even imagine having the entire world talking about the minutiae of my pregnancy, since really, what does it matter?  Just let her get through the crappy first trimester, glow and plan and feel the joy during the second trimester, then survive and experience the nervous and exciting anticipation of the third trimester, all culminating in bringing her own little miracle into the world.  Because while, to you, this may be the heir to the throne, one of the most famous babies in the world, to Kate, it is her child, just her little baby to love.  Maybe just by writing this, I am being a hypocrite, but, while I refuse to link to the original articles that discussed these topics, I feel compelled to give a little perspective on why I will say, once again,


1) What Will Kate’s Maternity Style Be? – The poor girl is living in the world of 24/7 nausea, and, in her case, to a greater extreme than even many other pregnant women.  She is likely exhausted.  If you’ve never been pregnant, think of the most tired you have ever felt.  Then multiply that by, oh, about 10,000.  Then square it.  And finally, multiply it by N + 1, where N = the number of children you already have.  Yeah, that tired.  And not just tired as in you want to go to sleep, but tired as in every movement of your body feels like it takes the equivalent effort to, oh, say, rolling a boulder up a mountain.  Right now, I guarantee she isn’t thinking much about her maternity style.  If she gets out of pajamas and puts on yoga pants, it’s a victory.  Give her a few more weeks, to the point where she gets past the is-she-fat-or-pregnant look to where has a cute baby bump, but it is not so big that it is making her top heavy so that she needs an oh-so-attractive maternity support belt just to feel like she doesn’t have a bowling ball super glued to her abdomen.  Jessica Simpson rocking stilettos till her due date, and Kim Kardashian wearing skin tight see-through dresses at 12 weeks – yeah, I pretty much guarantee you that is happening during the 10% of the time that they happen to get on camera because they feel they have some image or persona to live up to, and the rest of the time, elastic waist pants and slip on sneakers (so they don’t have to bend down to tie their shoes) are their best friends.

2) Kate’s Having Twins!! – Yes, there are statistics that women who suffer from first trimester nausea have a lower chance of miscarriage, and those who have it to the extreme of Hyperemesis Gravidarum, like Kate, have a slightly higher likelihood of twins.  But first, let’s talk math – odds of having twins are very low, particularly if you are not going through fertility treatments.  So multiplying a very small number by another low number still gives you a very small number.  And second, she is in her first trimester.  Right now, Kate is just hoping and praying that she has A baby that she carries to term.  If she is like every other pregnant woman out there, until she hits the magical point of 12 weeks, when odds of miscarriage drop dramatically, every time she goes to the bathroom, she probably has the worry, even if it is just in the back of her head, that this is going to be the time she sees something red or pink or brown that will send her into a panic and straight to her doctor.  And even after 12 weeks, until you can feel that baby moving regularly, you are just betting on the fact that things are progressing as they should be.  So yeah, right now, twins are not her top concern.  Just having a healthy baby and feeling like a human is the priority.

3) When and Where Was the Royal Baby Conceived? – Umm, what?  OK, granted I am not jet setting around the world, but where and when and how is between my husband and I (and our fertility doc, but that is another story for another time).  If I knew that anybody out there was trying to figure out how far along I was, then trying to determine my coordinates for when sperm met egg, I would be disgusted.  None of your freaking business, to be perfectly blunt.  Granted I have not gone anywhere further than Vermont or Virginia, not like the Royal Couple who have set foot on practically every continent, but I really just can’t understand why anyone would feel compelled to determine the date range in which the child could have been conceived, then look at their itinerary, and list out every possible location.  I saw that.  Hello?!  I just can’t even say anymore.

4) What Will They Name the Heir to the Throne? – Although not as private as #3, this, too, is between Will & Kate (and maybe, in their case, certain family members?  I am not sure of the royal protocol there).  I know that today it has become commonplace to tell everyone your child’s name before he or she is born.  And if you choose to do that, it is perfectly fine.  Your decision.  But you and your husband chose it together and made the decision to share it together.  And the reason why some people, myself included, choose not to tell people, is that, besides the fact that I have a bad tendency to be indecisive and change my mind, we don’t want to hear what you think about it.  It is our decision, and once you see adorable little Romulus, you either won’t care or won’t be brazen enough to state an opinion about his name.  That, and I don’t want to end up with eleventy billion things with the name Romulus scrawled across them when, in the delivery room, I decide that he really looks like a Remus.  So let Will & Kate name THEIR child, and they will tell all of us when they see fit.  And if it is after said child is born, so be it.

As the arrival of this royal little babe draws closer, I am sure that opining, speculation and, just flat out rudeness will continue.  You know what I say – close the magazine, don’t click on the link, forget the retweets, and just let these wonderful people experience the ups, downs, expectations, fears, frustrations, and joys of becoming parents.




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  1. says

    Yes, but unfortunately for her, it is part of her “job” to be noticed, commented on, and judged. She is one of the main PR people for the country, a job that puts her in the spotlight 24 hours a day, 365 days of the year. There are days when all the attention may get wearing (like now), but, let’s face it, she knew what she was getting into when she smiled back at William the first time he noticed her.

    • says

      Oh I totally agree, and I also totally expect and think it is fine for some aspects of her pregnancy to be discussed in the media and in public. But there are some limits, and I think everybody deserves some degree of privacy, regardless of who you are. So while she knew what she was getting into, I don’t think any woman has any clue about how pregnancy is going to make them feel or how it is going to affect their body and mind, and she deserves some time to adjust to it.

  2. says

    omg Brianne, I knew I loved you. I am not pregnant, I am as far from pregnant as one can get with 5 teenagers but every sentiment, every word you wrote – all of it is stuff I have thought more than once since the day the news was released. Even when it was released, I remember thinking – really? It’s too early to say anything… why would they do that… blah blah blah.
    I know, she’s royalty so we all need to know her every move, but we really don’t.

    P.S. My daughter Brielle – yep nobody knew her name until she was a day old because I refused to let ANYONE dictate to me what her name would be. Not even her dad knew until she was born. 😉

    Good luck with your pregnancy and keep your chin up. Just be thankful you aren’t waddling around with paparazzi following you everywhere… can you imagine? Ugh!

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